Category: writers notebook (Page 3 of 4)

Guilty/Not Guilty

July 16, 2022 / / 0 Comments

I sat down to work on my fiction this morning, but I ended up doing a lot of writing in my notebook instead. Some fragments/thoughts about the morning walk with my daughter (something that’s becoming our daily ritual), some thoughts about plot structures (and the manuscript I am editing for a client), some thoughts about my own works in progress and what plot structures they follow, and then I took a bunch of notes on the Michael Moorcock system for writing a novel in three days.

I’d read about Moorcock’s system before, but today I felt like copying it down into my writer’s notebook so I could internalize it. Not that I’m planning to write a novel in three days, but I appreciate the way Moorcock breaks down how to structure and think about narrative. I especially love his idea of generating a list of fantastical images that employ paradox as a way to make something memorable and interesting (ex. “The City of Screaming Statues”).

Anyway, I didn’t work on my fiction at all during my morning “writing time.” There’s a part of me that says, “Wasted time!” and beats myself up for not adding words to my manuscript. But there’s the other part of me — the idler and reveler — who thinks mucking about in the notebook is both fun and necessary to my creative life. All the things I wrote in the notebook will help me later on — whether it’s later today or tomorrow or next week — giving me food for thought regarding my fiction work. Not “productive” in the strictest sense, but productive nevertheless. Sometimes I need to approach my writing “sideways” — not head-on but through the alleyways of my writer’s notebook. These alleys and byways set the stage for my later productivity in the manuscript. So it feels like I’m slacking, but really, I’m turning over the compost heap and making the fertilizer.

Notebook Fragment

July 15, 2022 / / 0 Comments

Even now, I still worry that I’m being followed by the bee. It’s in my hair, just waiting to come out.

(This fragment was occasioned by the morning walk I took with my daughter. A bee or strange fly followed us from our driveway all around the block, past the wild blackberry bushes, around the school yard, and even down the sidewalk as we ran furiously from it. It kept wanting to nest in our hair. Maybe it liked our shampoo. To get back into the house, I lured the bee into the backyard while my daughter dashed through the front door. Then, she opened the sliding glass door in the back and I rushed in. Despite being inside again for two hours, I keep thinking the bee is with me.)

Why I Blog, Reason #17

March 15, 2021 / / 0 Comments

My daily blogging has taken a hit lately. Part of that is due to being more focused on my fiction stuff at the moment. When I only have 40 minutes each day to devote to writing, those minutes are better spent working on my stories and novels. The cool news is that I finished “The Wind Masters,” I’m almost finished with “Things” (which is being re-titled “Berserker” or “A Good Defeat,” not sure yet), and I’ve written several chapters for my novella, Avalon Summer, and two chapters of a new novel (The Gates of Illvelion). I’m just writing what feels right, so each night I sit down and see where my subconscious takes me.

I do miss blogging though. It’s nice to write my thoughts and see where my mind wanders. The process for the blog is that I usually steal stuff from my writer’s notebook and type it up here, maybe adding or tweaking a bit. But generally, I start with my notebook and then formalize or expand on those thoughts here on the blog.

Sometimes, however, I just craft a blog post without any previous drafting or anything. That’s what this post is. Just me writing random stuff. Sitting down with the WordPress dashboard open and typing away. I’m not sure what the point of this post is; there is no point, really. But I’m old school, and that means I think of this blog more as my personal space than as some kind of marketing thing or whatever. I’m not trying to get “traffic.” Maybe I should be, but I’m not.

(Note: This wasn’t always the case. Early on, when I first set up the website, I thought the blog should be some kind of marketing or “branding” thing and I tried to fit my writing into that model. After struggling to add “content” and finding the whole thing burdensome, I gave up that approach. When I restarted blogging these past few years, I did so with the intent to write more personally, more randomly, and more authentically. Thus you get blog posts like this one, which are little more than idle thoughts.)

Is it self-indulgent to write all these random thoughts and ideas? Perhaps. I mean, if I’m not writing for some specific audience, or about some specific topic, then one may ask, “What’s the point?”

But I’d like to think that if — on some off chance — someone stumbles onto my blog, they might find solidarity or comfort or interest in my odd ramblings. Maybe this hypothetical reader is also a struggling writer, and maybe this hypothetical person might enjoy reading about my travails and ups-and-downs and whatnot. Or maybe they like the blog posts about the different writing exercises I use in my classroom. Or maybe they like to laugh at my poetry. Who knows.

I don’t really write for anyone, though. Just myself.

Saturday Things

February 6, 2021 / / 0 Comments

I got my first dose of the Moderna Covid-19 vaccine today. So far: soreness in arm, moderately bad headache, and fatigue. Otherwise, feeling okay.

My current project is a short story called, tentatively, “Things.” (Yes, I know. The title is completely un-evocative. It basically means nothing. However, there is a story-related reason why it’s called “Things,” but I realize that as titles go, it doesn’t grab anyone’s attention. So it’s a working title that will probably change once I’m done.)

I wanted to read a few hard-boiled short stories and watch a couple of films noir to get in the mood, but honestly, it’s been hard to find the time for any of that. I can watch certain old movies when my kids are around — musicals are usually safe, as are silent and screwball comedies — but film noir is one of those genres that is not appropriate for the under-six set.

Anyway, I watched so many films noir in my twenties and early thirties that I could recite many of them line-by-line, so it’s not like I don’t know the style and mood of these kinds of stories. But just for fun, I wanted to dive back in and reacquaint myself with these old friends. Maybe there’s still time. . . I’m only half-way finished with the story.  “Things” is one of those stories where I pretty much know the ending already, but I’m not sure yet how I’m going to get there or what it’s going to look like when I do. It’s a bit like knowing there’s going to be a car wreck, but not knowing how the bodies are going to end up. (Sorry, that was a morbid analogy!)

Today was also a great day because I made it through a week of using my new “habit schedule,” and so far, it’s been successful. Each day this week I’ve managed to carve out time to pray in the morning and before bed, read something spiritual (current books are the Pope’s new one and The Imitation of Christ), write in my writer’s notebook, read a book at lunchtime, enter grades/provide feedback to students, work on freelance editing stuff, exercise, stretch, and write something creative (either fiction or this blog). My not-every-day-but-a-few-times-a-week habits — doing some light cleaning, paying bills, and filing papers — were also a success.

I will say the methods outlined in James Clear’s Atomic Habits have been very helpful in this regard, particularly his advice to “make it easy” and “make it satisfying.” I use a habit tracker app on my phone (that’s the “make it satisfying” part), and I’ve rearranged a few things to make the habits easier.

For instance, before I go to bed at night, I make sure my writer’s notebook is sitting on the dining room table so that in the morning it’s ready for me to write in as I eat my breakfast. Another example of making it “easy” is that I put Swiffer dusters in various rooms around the house so I can just pick one up and start dusting if I have a spare moment. And finally, I set a daily alarm on my phone to ring when it’s time to enter grades and do freelance work. I’ve also tried to “habit stack,” where I tie a new habit to an existing one (like the habit of writing in my notebook while I’m eating my breakfast, or reading a book while I eat my lunch).

The one habit I might need to modify is the exercise one, because I used to exercise before I took my shower, but that made mornings too hectic, so I switched exercise to the afternoon, when I get home from work. However, that get-home-from-work time is quite busy too — the kids are excited to see me, I’ve got to change out of my work clothes and clean my lunch containers, start to prepare dinner, etc. — so my exercise time has been shorter than usual everyday this week (I’ve been breaking the “make it easy” rule). Maybe I need to move the exercise back to the morning and do it before my shower. . . (I hesitate to do this, though, because that means getting up earlier, and I’m already struggling to get up at 7:00 a.m.; 6:45 a.m. might be a bridge too far.)

Despite these few hiccups, I’m utterly pleased with how much I was able to get done this week, and with how much less stress I’ve had. I’m not particularly strict about my habit schedule as far as doing things at a very specific time, but I’ve found that having an outline for the day has given my life a pleasant rhythm. I know that I want to accomplish these various “little things,” and by doing them each day in small chunks, and at generally the same time each day, I’ve been able to accomplish quite a bit, even in just a week’s time.

Wide-Open Saturday

January 23, 2021 / / 0 Comments

Today was one of those days where I had lots of plans — lots of stuff was gonna get done — and instead, I did practically nothing. I went to the grocery store; that was my big accomplishment. Also, I made some homemade hummus. Otherwise, all the essays I was going to critique, all the fiction I was going to write, all the editing work I was going to do: Nada.

I did manage to read a bit. I wrote in my notebook. But these little things — the reading, the notebooking, the hummus-making, the grocery shopping — they don’t add up to much. I know they’re good things to do, I’m glad I was able to do them, but they feel small. And today was my wide-open Saturday! The day my kids spend with Grandma and Grandpa. It was *the* time to Get Things Done. Instead, I did little things. Good things, important things, but little things. The “big things” — the projects, the assignments, the teaching and freelancing work — none of them fit into the day. Instead, I wrote a few pages in my notebook, ate breakfast with my kids, read some of Pope Francis’s new book, watched TV with my husband, made hummus, went shopping, went to mass, came home and ate dinner. A good day, and yet… and yet…

I don’t know. Maybe it was a good day, full stop. No regrets for the big things I didn’t get done. Maybe the expectation that I should use my “wide-open Saturday” to do “important” work is a misguided expectation. Is it really wrong to spend my free time with my husband, or make some homemade food to feed my family, or go shopping for groceries, or go to mass and worship God (the most important thing I’ll do all  week), or read a book, or just relax? The projects and assignments are still looming, and I’ll have to do them eventually, but for this one day, this one Saturday, the little things were worth it.

Poem #9

January 20, 2021 / / 0 Comments

I gave my students a prompt today for our “writing workshop.” It was as follows: “Write a list poem using only CONCRETE NOUNS. Make the title an abstract word such as: Compassion, Jealousy, Envy, Wisdom, etc.”

Since I believe it’s important that I share in the work my students do (especially when that work is writing), here is my poem. Not sure if I like it, but in the spirit of “show your work,” I’m sharing.

 

Time

Bed sheets.

Pillow.

Alarm clock.

Pillow.

Cat claws.

Coffee cup.

Soap.

Boots.

Mittens.

Rosary beads.

Notebook.

Sticky notes.

Screens.

Screens.

Screens.

Bells.

Diet Pepsi.

Peanut butter.

Steering wheel.

Dinosaurs.

Crayons.

Toothbrushes.

Books.

Binkies.

Kisses.

Tears.

Hugs.

Nightlights.

Dishwater.

T.V.

Vitamins.

Books.

Bed sheets.

Pillow.

Pillow.

Pillow.

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